The Lee House Rules

Chapters 1–6 taught you how the game is played here. This chapter is the fine print: the specific provisions that decide arguments, plus the table law that isn’t about tiles at all. If you learned elsewhere, some of these will scandalize you. Sit with that feeling. Then comply.

The gameplay articles

Table law

The articles above cover the game. These cover the room. Same force of law — arguably more.

• Tai-Pong is a request for grace. Saying 太碰tai-pong means hold on, let me think about this one. It claims nothing. The table gives you the beat.
• Trash talk: encouraged. Coaching: forbidden. One voice per hand. Your cousin’s boyfriend does not need three advisors; he needs to lose authentically, like everyone before him.
• A false win (詐糊zaa wu) pays the table. Declare a win you don’t have and you pay everyone the Spicy maximum. Check twice. Declare once.
• The wall is sacred. Touch it out of turn and the whole table will make the same sound at you. You’ll know the sound when you hear it.
• First win is on the house. A first-timer’s first-ever win is celebrated, photographed, and paid double by the table. Nobody’s buying beginner tears at this establishment. This is also how we recruit.
• The peanut gallery eats quietly. Watching is free; opinions cost. The chair behind TaiTai is the best lesson you can get — take it, and take it silently.

Frequently argued questions

Can we play with jokers? No. We’re delighted your office plays American mah-jongg — you can play American rules at someone else’s house.

What do we play for? Default: a penny a chicken. Before the first deal, the table can discuss playing for more or less — dimes, chips, dish duty, whatever — and whatever it agrees on holds for the session. Nobody adjusts it mid-hand because they’re losing.

What if only three people show up? 三缺一saam kyut yat is a state of emergency, and emergency powers apply: cousins may be woken, neighbors may be recruited, and yes, the person who “just came to drop off oranges” is now a mahjong player. The oranges were a contract.

That’s the whole constitution. You know the tiles, the turns, the wins, the money, and the law. All that’s left is the cheat sheet — and a seat. 開檯hoi toi!